I had to fast for a medical test the other day which turned out to be an interesting experiment. Not being able to eat all day really brought out my eating disorder – I wanted to eat the whole house and was planning the binge food I was going to buy when I could eat. You see, every restriction throws a binge-eater into a binge and this was no exception. However, I didn’t act upon my planned binge. I have noticed that the anticipation of the binge is more powerful for me than the actual activity of the binge. Is the anticipation a result of habit or do I really have the emotional and physical urge?
Since I’ve been binge-free since April 2013. I still plan binges but, interestingly enough, don’t act upon them when the time comes. I’m not sure why this is but I’m not going to look a gift horse in the mouth! Maybe when the time comes for the binge, my body wisdom guides me to nourish instead of gorge.
You are transforming. Our brains function very much like our computers. Your thoughts are the data that we enter into our “computer like brains”. Thought is the cause and experience is the effect. Since you didn’t like the effects of the binge, you programmed in different thoughts (data). The results are that your binging has stopped. Your experiencing a transformation because of all of your work changing your thoughts. Can it be that in just a little while, you’ll turn around, and finally emerge the butterfly???