I will be attending a very sad event today to support one of my closest and dear friends. At this gathering people, whom I haven’t seen in many years, will be attending which is causing me anxiety because I have gained so much weight since I last saw them and because I am the size that I am.
It’s interesting that I never realized that this feeling of anxiety was the primary reason for me making excuses to ditch events over the years. I want this time to be different so I’m telling myself that I am beautiful, that I don’t care what people think about my weight (remembering the internal vs. external feedback blog I wrote earlier this week) and that I will be happy to catch up with people I haven’t seen in years. It works for a while until my old thoughts manifesting the anxiety creep up and then I have to work to weave more positive thoughts manifesting a sense of peace instead. This is difficult mental jockeying but worth it in the end if it brings me one step closer to alleviating some suffering in my life.
Michelle – You are beautiful. This is never in question. It’s wonderful that you are writing this blog, making huge strides in understanding YOU better and making steps forward. Every day I strive for progress, not perfection. Deep breaths and power through. When you get to the other side, you’ll be so glad you did. You’ll feel really proud to not let the anxiety get the best of you. I empathize, when feeling anxious it sure isn’t easy to see your way out but one foot in front of the other and before you know it you’ll feel better and stronger too! Let’s catch up soon.
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a similar one and i was just wondering if you
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There is a plug-in called Askismet that blocks spam. Good luck.